[He frowned sharply, silent for a moment or two as he again pushed back a comment one or both of them would regret. He had been through a situation too like this long before, and how many times had he replayed arguments like this over and over in his head?]

So you would blame them because you and yours ran out of patience? Because they did not trust us enough to share information, you gave them reason not to instead of reason for the alternative? I do not blame you for your impatience in itself, but a 'solution' like this should have been saved as an absolute last resort. Surely there is some middle ground to be sought between 'doing nothing' and 'causing chaos'.

And do not speak to me of what it is to care for others, for you know not what it is you say.