[Text] - Terminally Online

[elbowroom]

[This isn't the first time Jonesy has found herself waking up in a strange place she didn't remember going to sleep in. It isn't the first time a robot has woken her up, either.

The stone slab is new, though. As is the explanation that she's on an entirely different world than the one she knows.

She doesn't believe it at first, until she steps outside into an entire city of robots
- and their claim is further backed up by the fact that none of her implants can connect to a satellite to get her GPS location. Or the fact that the wireless matrix of this place is set up way differently than the matrix she's accustomed to.

There is a wireless network, though. And the robots even gave her a tablet to use. So, of course, Jonesy does what any hacker would do in her position: She searches the internet for answers.

And when she fails to find a quick and easy explanation of how to get home, she goes on the internet to complain.]


ok so ive been running the numbers in my head and its starting to seem very likely that this is all real, and that i'm not just experiencing biofeedback induced brain damage OR trapped in a hyper realistic VR sim from which i cannot escape.

in which case i must ask:

what the FUCK

you kidnap the best hacker in LA , take me to an alternate fucking planet in a city filled with sapient robots and dragons and gods and no one wants me to DO anything??

no hacking, no repairs, no IT work? i didnt get grabbed because someone was planning a cool space heist that they need my skills for? i'm just supposed to hug people?

i am feeling EXTREMELY undervalued here.

if i got picked because of the arms then i'm not hugging anyone. you robots can go fuck yourselves if thats what this is about.

Comments

[elbowroom]

that's funny. im from a version of earth, but mine has elves, dwarves, orks, trolls, pixies, dragons, sasquatches and a bunch of other ones. we don't have cat people but we do have changelings which can look like whatever - i actually just worked with a changeling that looks like a big lizard man.

(i'm a changeling, btw. used to be human though)

he can type, yeah. he's slow at it though - what first got us talking was when he realized that i knew sign language and he could talk with me more freely

[astralera]

How can you used to be human?

I am not 'human', I am an Au Ra. My kind has features oft seen as 'draconic', though we've no relation to dragons.

I have an ability that translates the language of all beings with souls. I have never encountered someone who speaks only sign language, but I should be able to understand it. My husband and Solus both have the same gift.

That aside, if you ever wish to teach sign language I would be happy to learn it. I learned a little bit a few years ago, but not much.

[elbowroom]

changeling isn't a species its a classification. we were changed, hence the name, in a process called the sudden unexplained recessive genetic expression, or SURGE.

when i was 12 a magical comet passed over my planet and mutated a bunch of people. i was one of them. i don't look like a human anymore but i still pretty much think of myself as one.

thats a convenient power. i don't know how it works but brrbrr definitely has a soul so you could probably talk to him if he showed up. he'd like that.

i could definitely teach you sign language too though. seems like a good way to pass the time here.

[astralera]

That is rather odd. Aside from the physical mutations you are all well, I hope?

It is an innate ability Ardbert and I have no active control over. I couldn't tell you how it worked either.

There are many ways to pass the time here, though it gets boring after a while.

[elbowroom]

yeah. it was the worst couple days of my life but it was also 11 years ago so i'm fine now.

i mean, i'm still a freak, and that causes social problems sometimes. but for the most part i'm fine.

yeah it seems like there's not a lot for people to do around here. what do you tend to do for fun?

[astralera]

I am glad to hear you're doing well now. Society is a load of shite sometimes.

I keep busy with maintaining and improving my combat skills, adjacent crafting skills, and furthering my scientific education.

[elbowroom]

yeah society's fucked, but that's life. at least i made something of myself.

[Not that the thing she made of herself matters here. Even with all her know-how, she can't really do jack shit to make a magical god send her home.

....she's going to try not to think about how helpless that makes her feel.]

ok but what do you do for FUN.

do you party? cook? watch movies? do hard drugs? what do you do when you aren't working

[astralera]

I enjoy improving my skills and ensuring my loved ones are cared for. If they want to do something I am happy to join them.

[elbowroom]

more than the god killing stuff, that tells me how different our lives are lol.

that's sweet though. sounds like your boys are very lucky.

[astralera]

I'm glad to hear it. The life of a Warrior of Light is unenviable.

I am the lucky one. I do not deserve their affection and yet they offer it to me all the same. That they are both lovely to look at adds to my good fortune 🥰

[elbowroom]

i dunno, i bet i could envy it. plus youre like some kind of chosen hero, right? sounds enviable as hell.

[This is supposed to be banter. Era doesn't seem to be the type who does a whole lot of banter, but this is one thing that Jonesy does for fun.]

actually speaking of which, your world isn't like... doomed now that their legendary warrior of light is gone, is it?

[astralera]

There is nothing enviable about it. Many of your friends and loved ones will die, because you cannot be everywhere at once. Everyone will look to you to save them and resent you when you cannot. Your life will never belong to you, and you must carry the fate of your world in your hands, all while knowing that you will never be as strong as you need to be because for all your strength you are subject to the frailty of flesh.


We are returned from the moment we are taken, as though we were never gone at all.

[elbowroom]

sure.

but not every world gets a hero who has the power to stand up and save the day. i'm not trying to say you have a perfect life with no problems, but it sounds better than a lot of stuff i can imagine.


that's an interesting fact. how do we know that?

[astralera]

Believe whatever you like.


Because people have experienced it.

Private

[elbowroom]

you seem upset but i'm only believing the shit you've told me. you have a wonderful love life and enough power to kill a god.

i'm a mutant freak who lives out of a truck. i'm not trying to insult you, but to me it sounds like you have a good thing.

[astralera]

You seem to believe what I have here and at home are at all similar. They are not. There has never been nor will there ever be a 'love life' for me in my world.

Stop speaking of power as though it magically makes life good. All it does is make people use you as a tool. The more strength you have the more of a weapon you become.

I gladly accept this role. I merely wish people would stop deluding themselves into believing there is any glory, freedom, or happiness to be found as a 'hero'. There is not. You can ask anyone from my world and they will tell you the same.

You are alive, have shelter, a boyfriend, and a life that is yours to do with as you please. That sounds like a good thing to me.

this is so long, I'm sorry

[elbowroom]

that may be true about having power, but being powerless sucks.

i've spent my life on a poisoned planet ruled by corporations, pretty much all of whom pursue profit no matter how much war, environmental damage, and suffering they cause.

no one can really stop them and no one's ever going to. they have all the money and the power, every weapon on the planet comes from them, and a lot of the magic does too. everyone pretty much understands that we're on a long, hot slog to the end, but it's a slog that's making a profit so we've all got to keep doing it.

there's no heroes where i come from. none of us are going to save the world because it's structured itself in a way that prevents saving.

so the idea that heroes can step up and change the way things are sounds pretty cool! i've never said that you had a perfect life, it sounds like a high stress position that doesn't come with a lot of rewards. but it's something that would be cool to have where i come from.

also: in a lot of ways i DO have a good thing going. i have shelter, i have access to the equipment and surgeries i need to do my job. i'm not owned by a corporation, which gives me more freedom than a lot of other people.

this isn't me saying i have the worst life. i'm not trying to turn this into a pissing contest or a pity party, i just want to explain where my head is at when i say the whole the whole warrior of light, killing gods and saving people thing still sounds pretty cool. it makes your world sound like it has hope.