Hugtopia

Good evening.

[The voice that comes on is even and softly accented with what one could presume is an English accent, were England a place that existed for you.]

For those of you that don't know me yet, my name is Ignis. I'm here with something of an offer - as I'm sure most of you are aware, the ingredients the replicators seem capable of producing are strange. Some of them are completely foreign to me, but I'm something of a hobbyist chef. I know my compatriots are likely to eat my food with few complaints as they would not wish to hurt my feelings, and that simply won't do.

What I am offering is, of course, meals cooked for you. Nothing that will poison you, of course, but something to help acclimate me to the strange new foods I have at my disposal. If you're interested in trying, feel free to stop by.

[He leaves his address, and then signs off.]